矛盾

矛盾

发现自己
越来越矛盾
越来越不像话
越来越不像人

人看我好像
很开心
很开朗

但有多少人
会明白
我的内心
我的苦恼

好想好想
有人能够
明白我
安慰我

但有多少人
与我立场一致
和我想法相同
心有灵系

想法
是被自己掌空
还是由世界所有

情绪
自己控制不了
被世事困绕
自己受苦

人生
你想好的前途
但谁知道明天

没有方向
有时垂尚
甚至怀疑
活在世上
有没意义

撇下一切
结束生命
不敢
是不想
还是没勇气

joshuatly2009

2 Responses to 矛盾

  1. leong xiao en April 9, 2009 at 5:12 pm #

    I don’t know who else in this world can know our feelings. When we are in the downs of life , the world denied us, and not 1 person can understand us, and even ourselves couldn’t wana give up in life. Bt always remember Jesus understandus. He knows when our heaart needs encouragement. Need not a word, he console us when we kneel down in front of him. I don’t know what to say, but i really care for you. Church is always your home that made by God, although it is not perfect and quite broken. We will always waiting you with an open heart. If you want to come back, need not to hesitate, ok?=D will pray for you so that God will make a way for you and lead you to continue in this hectic life, and give you strength in these darkest hours. Jesus and I will always love you.

    dear sister in christ,
    xiao en.

  2. joshuatly April 9, 2009 at 6:31 pm #

    thanks very much for your comment.i will always remember there will be at least one (God) or more (church members) will support me when im down

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